Did I mention the other day that having a boyfriend changed some things. Well I'm back to tell you that they change everything. And don't get me wrong, it's not like I don't want to be with Jonnie or anything. But Everything changes. Suddenly you have to take into consideration another person when you make plans. Last year I was doing 1 night of college a week and I was busy at times but in no way was I as busy as I am this year. Last year I seemed to have alot of free time which I took for granted. I seemed to have time to watch my Gilmore Girls and Veronica Mars dvd's or play Sims2 or even scrapbook.

As Jonnie and I work just down the road from each other and he lives just down the road from both our jobs in the city, we spend alot of time together. We both love spending time together and lately we've been seeing each other most mornings before work, most lunch times and then friday nights and sunday afternoons. So we see each other alot. But this morning I had this huge panic attack and I was stressing alot. This year I am doing 2 nights a week of college Monday's and Wednesdays. I love college but it doesn't finish till 9pm and by the time I get out of the city and home it's 10pm. On normal nights I'm in bed by 9. I know I'm sad...lol.

So anyway the panic attack was due to feeling like I have no time in the world for anything. When I'm not at tafe I'm studying. And I feel like I rarely see my family anymore because I'm either at Tafe, with Jonnie or maintaining friendships. I was stressing about how exausted all this makes me feel and how I want to start my regular exercise again but I don't know how I can possibly pull myself out of bed at 5am. And I need to budget better and sort/organise about a million things and *gah*. I guess my internal stress probably isn't coming out at the level that it's at. I got upset at work this morning (work's another issue) and as Jonnie is home sick I took an early lunch and went and cried on his shoulder. He pretty much said that (as much as we love to be together) we both need to spend less time together in order for things to kind of normalise. So he was very good and he did calm me down. He's encouraging me to schedule into my planner everything I need to do and just clear my head. We decided to only see each other 2 or 3 times a week for lunch to allow for both of us to see other friends or do other stuff and we have friday night for us and some sunday arvo's. I know I will miss seeing him as much as I have, but I do need to make time for other things. And instead of coming in early to see Jonnie before work he's encouraging me to try and get that half hour extra of sleep...atleast the mornings after college.

Anyway this post isn't making sense and I'm feeling stressed again just thinking about how exausting everything is so I'm going to go. Luckily it's only half an hour before I can go home and attempt to relax before settling into my study.